Wednesday, February 19, 2014

All That Is Left Is Colors



*this essay was written in the spring of 2013




Bulgaria, 2013, in expectation of a new summer, a new hope, a new generation and a new government. I want to make a short preview of the whole situation in Bulgaria and what troubles me most. It's not about politics and society, it's all about being a human in your own country. 

Who is to blame? Where is the future, where are the people? What about the idea of life within a nation? Just asking myself questions with no answer…


Bulgarian lavender field




After the elections on 12th of May, again in the parliament entered 4 old parties. People that had already been given the chance to prove their love and care for their own country, but they didn’t pass the test. Three of them already governed the state and failed, the fourth, I guess (considering its mad leader) has failed before even had the chance to govern… Difficult situation, the people we most disliked are there again, ready to start their “new” journey towards power...

Sunflowers... welcoming as usual






Every day, unfortunately, I am a witness of walking ghosts – it's not a castle in England or France, the most haunted places, for it is here, in Bulgaria. Demotivated, desperate and sullen people, real shadows of living creatures who know no dignity… 


Today I saw one extremely angry mother who was shouting at her daughter: maybe because it’s the child’s fault she breathes, eats, wants some attention, love and warmth!



There are few smiling faces, few people laughing… it’s just like laughter declared war on Bulgaria. The young people, the best material, the battery full of energy, are at the airport, they are ready to leave. Really sad.

People say they are fleeing and avoid responsibility. Do you think these people are irresponsible? Do you think they leave their families, country, and home just for fun? It's you to decide!

Bulgaria offers spectacular views






When I travel around Bulgaria I see deserted towns, almost empty villages, cities that seem have passed through a tornado or some plague… It’s calm and relaxing, no noise, no life, nothing at all. Believe me, it's scary as hell!



Then what is left?



What do we have to alleviate our pain and our lives? 



What is the reason to smile, breathe, hope, imagine, love?

The colors…


Have you seen our immense and blue sky? It is so blue, there is no artist that can even get closer to this. It's a feeling, a feeling of being home!


Have you seen our green during May? It smells like life itself, it’s the Spring we all have in our hearts; it’s the feeling you belong to somewhere.


Have you seen the yellow of sunflower fields? It is just like nature is watching you through one huge yellow eye. It’s the feeling of summer love.


Have you seen the purple of lavenders, the pink of our unique roses? It’s much more than a purple sunset. It’s the feeling of motherly love and a gentle caress.



That’s all left: the colors!

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Sunday, February 16, 2014

My Friend




How, how you never saw?
Just once, my fellow old.
The truth inside my eyes-
only the longings of yours.

The Truth – pure and crystal, white
as the light of a sunny day.
No, it’s not dead, it’s still alive-
living, breathing, keep it stay!

I was out of mind days and nights,
roving, asking, I became a brute!
Trying to ask questions, ideas rise,
but no answers, they were never true.

Is my path the same forever,
in a Universe, deaf and blind?
Or to find the Death is better,
to understand my unrequited mind.

And worms will be those who
will deeply penetrate inside me.
My mind, my heart, even to
a memory of days behind me.

Deep and heavy shout out of me?
Or just to close this cleft where,
it comes from – the endless world of me,
Now an ugly, black wasteland there!

Look, look, my friend, into my eyes!
Don’t look at me, but begin to see.
See and understand what in human lies,
smile and sit, one eternity next to me!


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Friday, February 14, 2014

Why Is Coffee A Friend In Need




 Have you heard the maxim “A friend in need is a friend indeed?” I guess you have, you are smart, aren’t you? People usually find and make friendships out of people, different animals, imaginary and fictitious friends, dolls, books, anything you might think of! Well, I just want to write about something I consider my friend - the coffee – yeah, the black, perfectly smelling liquid which wakes up the half of the 7 billion population of the Earth. No scientific details, substances, whatever, that proves how healthy or unhealthy is coffee. I just want to share several moments with me, my coffee and… you. Such an intimacy!

A friend in need is a friend indeed!

 

“The Sun is shining mercilessly, telling you “Wake up, it’s 8:00, time for work!” You are tired, you are sleepy and let’s say, you aren’t very fond of your job. You are feeling like you are getting out of the morgue, not your own bed… but there is a little hope tickling you – the coffee. It will give you this life-giving impulse to face the routine. Well, after the first cup of coffee the world seems a whole lot better place.

“You are a student… you have an awful exam tomorrow, you have no idea what is it about, you feel like an Earth man on Mars. But… suddenly a great idea crashes into your burdened mind – let’s make a coffee and relax, and sit down and start reading and… I can make it tomorrow!”

“ You got back from the beach, took a shower, now you just rest… your body is still burning, but you are outside, it’s afternoon, everyone is napping, you feel the cool breeze caressing your hairs, sheltered from the sun… and you order a coffee. Completeness, the perfect relaxation, a dream that already came true.”

“Sitting on your desk, using your PC, but your brain is blocked! You can’t answer this email, it’s boring, it’s stupid, you want to suffocate this pretentious client… have no idea how to answer! Hm, you think, let me take one coffee, maybe I will think of something… and like the best friends are supposed to act, this black liquid takes you out of the darkness, makes you forget and gives you something that no one else can – unlimited horizons!”

“Late summer melancholy has wrapped the whole landscape. The sun is saying, quietly and magically, goodbye to all people, trees, plants and beasts. You’ve just arrived to an unknown place, and the locals are staring at you. You know this very well, you’ve been a traveler all your life. And you know how to turn this curiosity into а friendliness. You just sit next to one of the people and say “Hey, you want coffee?” A little smile starts cracking the ruddy face…”

We all do!



I really love coffee – the way it looks like, its effects, the way  it smells, these moments when it was my only companion. And I know where and when to find my friend in need!